Mass Transitions
by Spiritstrike
Summary: At first I was just playing my favourite video game, enjoying a good drink of Coke Zero, but then the next thing I know, the TV freezes and then a bright light blinds me. The next minute, I wake up and I'm in the middle of a warzone! What the hell am I supposed to do now? OC Self-Insert-ish. MShepxAsh.
1. Prologue

Chapter 1: Prologue

**Greetings to my fellow writers and Mass Effect fans, this is not only my first self-insert fanfic, but also my first ME fanfic well, and I am hoping that I get things as accurately as I possibly can without causing an uproar. I've had to go back constantly to the Mass Effect wiki (even though I have the games and have only played the first one twice, the second one more than others, and the third only three.**

**My memory is a bit blank when it comes to the first ME game, so if I get things wrong, then please let me know so that I'll remember for future use. But my memories are much better with ME2 along with ME3, so I deeply apologise if anything is off.**

**While I do support FemShep with Garrus Vakarian, I'm going to add a little twist with this. I've always seen FemShep being in most self-inserts, so why not just have Sheploo instead? I've never played him before and I'm curious to give him a shot, see how he goes in the story.**

**Also, I want to do a massive shout out to iNf3ctioNZ and his awesome Masses to Masses series. It was a huge inspiration for me and I cannot thank him enough for creating something so spectacular and very entertaining. I'll do my best to make things interesting, but it's going to be hard.**

**I hope you all enjoy this fanfic!**

* * *

I sigh for the umpteenth time since five minutes ago, leaning back in my chair and staring up at the ceiling, not paying any heed to the laptop on my... well... lap. _New Divide_ by Linkin Park is flowing through the speakers with its pure awesomeness like it always did whenever I felt bored. By my chair on the floor is the good stuff I've ever tasted: the legendary Coke Zero.

Skype sits on the screen of my laptop, and my best friend Claudia has been silent for the past six minutes, probably because she is distracted by Tumblr by checking her messages and reblogging the crap out of Gundam, the Braves, and Pacific Rim.

Ten minutes ago, I had finished watching Dragon Ball Z Kai and now I wasn't sure what to do anymore. Then again, there isn't much to do on a Tuesday night after a long hard day's work of cleaning the crap out of houses and the government carpark like we do every month.

I have no clue as to what to do while I've got my five days off work like I usually do. The silence was beginning to kill me, and so was the horrible feeling of boredom.

Unable to stand the quietness any longer, I lean forward and type in the chatbox: _"I'm just going to play Mass Effect for a while. I'm that bored again."_

Her response was almost slow for my taste.

"_Of course, I might watch some more Iron Leaguer for a bit. :3"_

"_Alright then, I'll see you in a couple of hours, sis,"_ I type and then set myself to Away in case anyone wants to try and talk to me.

I pick myself up off the chair and head over to the case where I keep my PS3 games, all in a neat arrangement according to their Australian ratings, from The Legend of Spyro: Dawn of the Dragon at the top of the case to The Last of Us at the bottom. And all snuggled closely together was the Mass Effect Trilogy, my all time favourite role-playing game series besides The Elder Scrolls.

I was very pissed off at BioWare for not having released the first Mass Effect game on PS3 after they had released both the second and third game a long time ago. I had felt great disgust for a long while, even after they had claimed Microsoft had the rights to the game and wouldn't do it, but that all changed when they released the Trilogy pack for the whole game, much to my annoyance. I had been forced to give away my old Mass Effect 2 and Mass Effect 3 games in order to get what I had always dreamed of: play through the whole trilogy without needing to download a digital copy.

I only ended up playing through the whole thing twice, with one of the endings making me cry because I chose the green ending. Yup, that was a terrible thing to do and dad called me out for getting too emotionally attached to characters. I couldn't blame him for that though, those characters meant everything to me.

I check the time on my watch.

It reads 6:22PM. I better get playing then before I get too exhausted from work.

I pick up the case, take out the disk and insert into the slot.

The console boots up as I pick up the familiar controller, fiddling with the joysticks to get my fingers in perfect working order and getting them warm enough to play. I always did like the feel of the sticks against my skin; they helped me to concentrate during those intense shooter moments, especially with holding down the L1 and R1 buttons whenever I got in those difficult fire fights, even on the easy setting.

I pick up the half-empty bottle of Coke Zero and take a swig, allowing the cold brown liquid to rush down my throat and into my belly, cooling it down. Drinking this stuff always made me feel better, especially when I felt down. It was probably much better than having to just swallow two and a half worth of medication just for the sake of keeping my mental condition under control.

Satisfied with the good stuff, I turn back to my T.V screen as the game starts to load up, the familiar Mass Relay with its gyroscopic rings rotating in the opposite direction of each other humming quietly before me.

The loading seems to be taking a little bit longer than I originally thought it would because the spinning rings just kept on going.

Huh.

I fold my arms across my chest, tapping my upper arms with my fingers impatiently. If this game froze itself again like the last time I played it, I'm gonna send a massive complaint to BioWare demanding an update to fix the bloody bugs.

Ok... now the spinning has stopped and the humming has ceased.

What the hell?

"What's up with that?" I mutter to myself. I get the nagging feeling that somehow the game had completely frozen again, much to my annoyance.

I stand up from my chair, walk around my coffee table and hold down the power button on the console. It beeps happily, its light flashing from greenish blue to red again as it prepares to power down just as I commanded it to.

Only the problem is the console refuses to power down and the Mass Relay remains on the screen.

This is getting really odd by the second. Did my entire PS3 decide to bug out on me when it was still brand new from this year? I growl underneath my breath, grinding my teeth against each other out of a bad habit. I try pressing the button again, but the console still refuses to shutdown.

"Fucking hell, BioWare!" I snarl angrily, turning my back on the screen and making my way over to the kitchen. I'm so going to make a call to the company and tell them how I really feel about them and their useless ways of making this game so buggy.

But as I make my way to the kitchen, my feet are held in place.

Wait, what's going on?

Feeling confused, I glance over my shoulder and realise to my horror the Mass Relay on the loading screen is glowing brighter and brighter by the second. Even the rings are spinning faster and faster than they normally would.

Scared out of my mind, I try to raise both arms in front of my face to shield myself from the glow, only they're locked firmly in place.

A long glowing tendril drifts from out of the screen and wrapped itself around my body and it began to pull me towards it.

I couldn't help but let off a terrified scream and my whole world goes white.

* * *

For how long I remain in the whiteness, I have no idea. Time seemed to slip by before I finally manage to slowly open my eyes. I find myself lying on my side, half my face buried in what appears to be soft grassy soil, soil that smelt fresh and clean, followed by the taste of something metallic. Then I realise that the taste was coming from my lips and tongue and I sit up, blinking my eyes for a moment and rubbing them quickly.

I spit out the taste and discover that it was blood that had been on my lips. I look at the ground and almost scream. There's a trail of blood from where I had been lying, my eyes then following the trail to a pile of human bodies, a man, woman, and two children. Their pale faces were lifelessly blank as though they appeared to be locked in a state of fear from the last thing they saw that might've killed them.

I feel the urge to throw up and I cannot help but do it, puking all over the grass in front of me.

"Come on, Clarissa, get a hold of yourself," I groan as I stagger to my feet.

A load metallic roar echoes around and I cry out, using my hands to cover up my sensitive ears. I scream in agony as the roar seemed to penetrate deep into my skull, even with my ears blocked. I cannot help but fall to the ground and curl up in a ball, wailing for the sound to stop and allowing tears to fall in fear.

"Make it stop!" I cry.

Then as if some deity (God or Primus, I don't know) had heard my plea, the roar ceased to no more than a low whine, followed by electric crackling like lightning striking in the sky.

I open my eyes and get back up to my feet again, rubbing my fears, only when I pulled my hand away there were small patches of blood in the middle of my palms. Shit, that scream must've almost busted my eardrums. Even the stinging sensation was enough to make me worried.

Shaking my head, I lift my head to the sky and froze.

The sky was nothing more than an angry red and a dark black. Just what was going on? Where am I? What happened to me? But the sky was no longer my main focus anymore. Hovering about what looked like some sort of small futuristic looking city some distance away was a massive cuttlefish-like creature with too many legs for me to count. It was an ugly black and greyish blue, red lightning flashing vigorously around it like a living nightmare from hell.

Then it sunk into me.

I was in the Mass Effect universe!

In the immortal words of Ian Shaw from his fanfic _Masses to Masses_: don't freak out.

If I was in the Mass Effect universe, then... that thing in the sky had to be Sovereign, a goddamn Reaper. And if Sovereign was here, then that meant Saren and the geth weren't too far behind either.

I glance over at the broken bodies I had seen before.

From the looks of things, the geth had been at work, gathering whatever humans they could to make husks using those dragon's teeth. Those bodies seemed a little fresh, judging by the trail of blood. And if they were fresh, the geth must be coming this way to pick up these bodies and take them to those horrible spikes.

"Crap," I sigh underneath my breath.

If this attack had just happened, then Commander Shepard and the _Normandy_ couldn't possibly be far away. If I was to survive, I may need their help. Whatever reason I had been sent here had to obviously start with them.

"Ok, no more thinking," I say to myself. "It's time to go hunting."

I glance around to find any weapons. I spot a Mantis sniper rifle and a Predator pistol lying beside the pile of bodies. Those would have to do for now, even if they were just simply too few to my liking. When I go to the Citadel, I would have to ask Shepard if I could stock up. That is if I manage to find him or her.

I pick up the weapons, being mindful not to disturb them out of respect for the dead.

There's a holster for the pistol, some clasps for the sniper, and a credit chit lying amongst the man's body. I feel bad about taking the stuff, but it made me feel better that they were getting a good use after lying around for so long. I wasn't sure how much was on the credit chit, but hopefully it will help me get a decent start in buying stuff in the not too distant future.

Something moves amongst the bushes nearby and I froze again.

No time for panicking again, got to get going before the geth show up to claim the bodies and make husks out of them.

Then I hear a series of shots being fired towards my right over the hill next to me.

I think I might know what those were.

I check to make sure that the weapons were secure in their holster and clasps and make a dash up the hill, crawling a fair bit to keep myself hidden from plain view. Having spent the last few months back at home walking up steep hills to get back to my house, it was easy I continued my way up and reached the top.

I remembered to stay low like those military soldiers do when they wanted to get up close to the enemy without being seen.

I peek over the hill slowly and... just as I suspected where the shots had come from, I spot Ashley Williams in her pink and white Phoenix armour making a run for it from a small platoon of geth.

Well crap.


	2. Into the Unknown

Chapter 2: Into the Unknown

**Alright, so, four reviews is a decent start for me, along with some favourites and follows. Thank you very much for that people. I've stated before I'm very nervous about doing this, but I'm hoping things will get a little better. While at the moment this chapter is going to be a bit of a tagalong thing for the moment (and me being the useless weight because of how inexperienced I am with weapons and being a soldier), it's going to get as original as I possibly can when we meet Garrus Vakarian. Yay.**

**I've had to split this chapter into two due to the first mission being too long according to the notes I had to write up. So if I get anything wrong, forgive me. My memory really sucks with the first game.**

**Let's get this party started!**

* * *

So I've come to the conclusion that I was on Eden Prime. Well that's pretty convenient with the appearance of Sovereign and seeing Ash running for her life from a bunch of recon drones as well as some geth not too far behind her. This was the moment where Commander Shepard and Kaidan Alenko show up around the corner and save Ash's life.

Only I don't see Shepard around as Ash takes down the drones and gets into cover to hide from the approaching geth, assault rifle ready and gasping in short breaths in an attempt to catch her breath.

Shit, not good.

Since there's no other option without Shepard being there to pull Ash from out of her predicament, I unclasp my sniper rifle and peer down the scope, taking aim as best as I could at the furthest geth from Ash so that I didn't accidentally shoot her.

I've obviously never fired a weapon before except in shooter games like Mass Effect and Transformers on my PS3. God, Bluestreak would have a cow if he found out I had useless aim, and then he'd probably chat me to death before the geth get me first.

As I peer down the scope, I really let out a string of curses. Turns out I don't have my glasses on me. I must've lost them when I had I had woken up. Wherever they were, they were long gone now because I've already got the sniper aimed as best as I could at the blurry image of the geth as they draw closer to Ash's position. The only thing that was a dead giveaway to its location was its flashlight head.

That seems easy enough.

There's still no sign of Shepard and the geth were drawing ever closer to Ash, spraying her hiding place with bullets to keep her down as they began to flank her in the opposite direction of each other.

I don't have any other choice. I carefully apply pressure to the trigger and almost jump as I felt the powerful recoil of the sniper, causing the barrel to launch into the air.

Thanks to not being able to keep a bloody hold of the rifle, the shot was off as it hit the geth right in the shoulder. It staggers in surprise and turns its head upwards to look up at me, the flashlight on its head flaring dangerously as it took aim at me with its assault rifle, the flaps on its head twitching as it clicked in its language.

Oh crap!

But it never gets a chance to fire as Ash released a stream of bullets square in the head. It lets off an ear piercing shriek, clutching at its chest as it goes down with a loud thud, its eye going dark.

The remaining geth chose to aim its weapon at Ash in order to finish her, only to go down from a headshot and I turn my head to see Commander Shepard and Kaidan Alenko making their way around the corner, a hard and determined expression on their faces.

Well, it would seem we have a default Male Shepard. Jesus, I hope his name isn't default otherwise I'll be struggling hard not to raise my eyebrow and laugh. I wasn't always fond of Sheploo for having such a robotic voice, but I suppose it beats better than him not being here at all. It would be interesting to hear what he sounds like too.

"Area's secure, Commander," Kaidan speaks up at last.

Shepard nods, but then his pale blue eyes focusing on me and he frowns.

Oh God, I hope he doesn't see me as a threat!

I raise both arms up in the universal gesture of surrender, showing I meant no harm at all.

I slide down the hill as carefully as I could, landing on my butt in the process. Ouch, that really smarts. I look up and I see bemused expressions on all three faces.

'Nice entrance, ya dumb diode,' my inner self tells me.

Brushing the dust off my jeans and jumper, I make my over to them just as Shepard's face changes to the usual emotionless look, flat lips and unreadable eyes. Man, why do I always suck with facial expressions? I never was very good, considering my Asperger's made it almost impossible to understand things.

"Who are you?" he asked.

I flinch a bit, but I try not to show I was afraid of some big, tall man who could kill me with one shot if he wanted to. "C-Clarissa Kaye, sir," I answer timidly.

Ash took a step forward and offered a hand out to me. "Thanks for the save back there," she said. Did she want me to shake it? I nervously oblige, her grip felt firm, but not too hard to hurt. I squeeze back and she seemed satisfied with it. "Where did you come from? I've never seen you around here before."

I almost tell them I was from a different dimension where they were nothing more than pixel made characters in a video game, but I stop myself just in time. They wouldn't even believe me anyway. It was probably best if I made something up. "Me and my family are newcomers to this planet," I explain, trying my best to keep a steady tone. "Well... they were newcomers until the geth showed up. When they attacked, my parents put me in a basement under the house. I heard screaming and then gunshots. It took me a while to realise what had happened and... I managed to climb out and make a run for it in case anymore showed up. And then I met you guys."

Shepard folds his arms across his chest, tilting his head to one side as though he was trying to consider if my little white lie was really the truth.

"And that sniper you fired was your first time using a weapon?" Kaidan asks.

I glance down at the sniper in my hand and nod. That was the truth.

"She does look like she had been running for a while, sir," says Ash. "Her clothes look a little dirty and she has blood on her pants, although I've never seen clothes like that before. They look... like they're from the twenty-first century."

"I prefer the style," I say, trying to hide my offense.

Wait, what did she mean by blood? I look down on my jeans and see a dry redness on my knees. Either I had landed pretty hard when I arrived or someone made the truth pretty real enough to match with my story. Unless that pile of bodies I saw before was what I had landed in.

I look up and nod, pretending to confirm Ash's belief. Better just run with it.

Finally Shepard let off a sigh and nodded. "Alright," he says, "it seems convincing enough."

I mentally let off a sigh of relief.

Shepard turns to Ash and asks who she was. Oh boy, here comes the flow of the game. It probably was best to play the oblivious one and just run with what is happening. I try to put on my best blank face, pretending to listen as Shepard and Ash talk about what had happened before Shepard arrived. The discussion on being the last of the squad made me want to almost tear up, especially by the way how guilty Ash sounded about the loss.

What surprised me most was when Shepard took a step forward and placed a hand upon her shoulder, saying, "It wasn't your fault. You couldn't have done anything to save them."

Huh. That was never in the game. Though most of my playthroughs consisted of FemShep and romancing the crap out of Garrus Vakarian just because I found that story much more entertaining than Sheploo's romance with Ash.

Ash bows her head in response to Shepard's kindness. "Thank you, sir," she sighs, looking down on the ground and her face forms into a tired expression for the first time.

Guess the game mechanics really are limited.

"Continue," Shepard says gently.

Ash nods and goes on aboard how she and her squad held their position for as long as they could until the geth overwhelmed them.

"The geth haven't seen for nearly two hundred years since they disappeared behind the Veil," states Kaidan, looking puzzled. "Why would they be here now?"

Ash suddenly perks up. "They must've come for the beacon," she suggests. She turns and points to the far side of the canyon. "It's just over that rise not far from our position."

Kaidan looks over to Shepard, a determined look in his eyes. "We should get to the dig site before the geth do," he tells him.

Shepard nods and turns his head to Ash. "We could use your assistance."

"Yes, sir," she says, her face hardening. "It's time for some payback for what the bastards did to my squad." She punches her fist against her palm for more effect.

Some part of me instinctively tells me to go along with them as well. Usually most fanfics of people getting teleported into the Mass Effect universe had them go along with Shepard for the ride just to find out what they must do if they were to either get back home or figure out what do to from there. Either way, I'm going along with them too whether they liked it or not!

"Wait!" I speak up, stopping them from taking a step. "Let me come too."

Shepard blinks in surprise. Was he thinking that this was some kind of joke? Would a civilian who has never fired a shot in her life be able to be of some use to him and his men? Would I even jeopardise the mission? Oh, God. What if I screwed up on that question?

"Are you good with a gun?" Shepard asks after a few seconds of silence.

I shake my head honestly. "I'm not," I say, "but I want to go with you to get some payback at the bastard who killed my parents."

I'd managed to stop myself from saying it was because I wanted to help him bring Saren to justice. That would've made me look suspicious and that I knew a lot more than they don't know. Better to just go with what your head was telling me and not my heart.

Shepard looks over at Kaidan, who shrugs, and then he stares at me with those ice blue eyes. Was I convincing enough to say I could come with him and his squad? He seems to be thinking it over carefully, and I mean really carefully with the way how he was looking at me.

I decide to play another tactic. "I know a lot more than I appear," I continue. "I promise I won't be a burden to you if you would just let me come with you. Plus, you can train me to be a proper soldier."

Silence once again hung in the air before Shepard lets off a sigh of defeat and reluctance. "You can come," he says and I almost jump for joy before he spoke up again in a stern tone like a father scolding his own child. "_But_ you must do exactly as we say. Do not hesitate to do what I say, duck when we duck, run when we run, shoot when we shoot. Are we clear on that?"

I nod and give him the Aussie salute in the best way that I can, much to everyone's amusement.

"Welcome aboard," Shepard says and I shake his hand. Once again, that tight grip was applied and I do the same thing as I did before with Ash. Satisfied, Shepard turns to Kaidan and Ash. "Are any of you two willing to give her a spare shield compactor?"

Ash stepped forward, unclasping something from her belt. "I'll do it," she announces. "Since she helped save my life, it's only fair that I return the favour." She hands me a small white box with clasps on its sides that was the same white as her armour.

"Strap it onto your waist," the Commander says.

I nod and slip it on one of my belt slots, my hands nervously shaking. It beeps and the clasps lock onto the slot and a bright blue flicker passed over me, signalling that the kinetic barriers were activated, ready to stop any bullets that may harm me in a fire fight.

I hadn't mentioned my vision impairment to Shepard during my statement in order to convince him I could be of some use. If I had told him about it to him, he wouldn't let me come with them. I feel a little guilty for not saying so, but what else could I do?

Once the shields were up, Shepard motions with his assault rifle towards the rise. "Move out!" he orders.

I nod and bring out my pistol, checking to make sure that it was ready, as we head up the little slope where Ash had said the dig site was located. I lag behind the group a little bit, trying my best to keep up with them. I wasn't as fit as they were, but I promise to myself I'll hit the gym if there was one onboard the _Normandy_. Dad once said to me that doing exercise made you live longer.

"You ok?"

I jump, glancing to one side to see Ash running alongside me. She had a look of concern on her face, probably because she was worried that I was thinking about my parents. I nod in response to her question. "Yeah, I'm just..."

She nods in understanding. "I know how you feel," she says kindly, giving me a reassuring light squeeze on the arm. "Don't worry, I'll look after you. We girls have to stick together."

"Thanks," I smile.

"Come on you two, keep up!" Kaidan barks over his shoulder from in front of us.

I roll my eyes as Ash does the same, chuckling. We both run to keep up with the men, though Ash sets herself at an even pace for me to keep up with. Guess she's not as bad as I thought she might be even though I did choose her over Kaidan during my playthrough of the game.

The run didn't take long, but we reached a rocky outcrop. A vague memory of the geth being on the other side flashed before my eyes. I definitely recall this part! I tighten my grip on my pistol, moving closer beside Ash without her noticing.

Shepard holds up his hand into an open palm, the all too familiar military signal for stop.

We stopped for a moment and Shepard whipped out his sniper rifle, putting his eye to the scope. I knew exactly what he was looking at. He then pushed his left palm up and down, signalling us to get to cover. We did so and I took cover behind a tall rock that seemed like a decent place, with Ash amongst a long fallen pile next to me. Kaidan went to the right alongside Shepard.

I peer slowly from around my cover, spotting at least four or five blurry images of geth moving amongst the rock formations that surrounded the dig site. It has hard to tell without my glasses, but the flashlight heads showed their positions easily for me.

Shepard holds up three fingers, beginning a countdown for when to fire.

I could feel my heart pound furiously against my chest as it poured adrenaline through my veins.

The geth continue to move about in the dig site, two of them moving in our field of vision. If I remember correctly, there was also one hiding around the corner. I've got to remember that it may try to outflank us.

The fingers go down slowly from two to one.

I hold my pistol tighter.

Zero.

We unleash hell upon the geth as we fire at them with a stream of bullets. I would've panicked if it weren't for Ash sticking close beside me to give some assistance. I manage to fire a couple of shots at a close by geth, but two of them miss the target and I curse underneath my breath. However, I scored a lucky shot that managed to hit the geth in the chest. Its shields flicker slightly and it turns to aim its weapon at me.

I barely manage to duck back behind cover as the geth's assault rifle fires bullets at the spot where I had just been, kicking up rocks and dust as they hit the rock. I manage to sneak a glance over at Shepard and Kaidan as they finish off two of them with relatively ease.

Kaidan's body flared bright purple and blue and threw an arm forwards. Two of the geth are lifted up into the air, while Shepard turns and aims his weapon on them. They both screech electronically and become lifeless, their bright lights dimming into darkness. Kaidan released the hold and the body fell back to the ground.

I squint my eyes to try and enhance my impaired vision; I squeeze the trigger on my pistol and fire several more shots at my target. The shields go down completely and Ash manages to shoot it in the head with her rifle. The geth sparks and squeals loudly, making me wince from the loud noise. I really wish I didn't have such sensitive ears.

Shepard and Kaidan finished off the rest just as I spot the one geth around the corner that seems to be trying to outflank Ash and myself. "Commander," I shout over the shooting, "eleven o'clock!"

"Got it!" he shouts and shoots its shields down enough for Ash to give it a decent headshot to finish it off for good.

"Clear," Ash announces and I return my pistol to its holster, letting out a shaking breath that doesn't go unnoticed by Shepard. He comes over to me and gives me a pat on the shoulder, much to my surprise.

"Good job trying, kid," he says. "Take a breather."

I nod and let out deep gasping breaths to try and calm my racing heart. I'd never felt so... frightened in my life. Normally I wouldn't be gunning and running just to stay alive. This was real now, not a game! As I calm myself down, I look at my pistol on my hip and the sniper strapped to my back. I'm definitely going to buy some new weapons once we get to the Citadel. I'm useless with just these two.

"Alright, let's get going," Shepard orders and we continue towards the dig site.

But as we draw closer, I hear Ash's astonished gasp.

The beacon wasn't there in its rightful place.

"But it was right here!" Ash exclaims. "It must've been moved or something."

This would usually be the moment where Nihlus comes over the comm. about the change of plans.

And right on cue, Shepard's com-link goes off. He puts his hand to his ear as Nihlus speaks. _"Change of plans, Shepard,"_ he says. _"I'm heading to investigate a spaceport. I'll meet you there."_

"We're on our way, Nihlus," Shepard answers. "We'll see you there."

Oh you have no idea how wrong you are, Shepard, my friend.

Shepard's face hardens and he signals for us to move out. We make our way behind a pillar and up an all too familiar hill towards a couple of buildings. An all too familiar cutscene goes through my mind and I really wish I was feeling confident like the soldiers. I always did hate husks, they make me want to hit something in frustration when they swarm you and melee the crap out of you.

"On your guard," Kaidan says without warning.

I nod and whip out my pistol, stiffening up my body in preparation for the worst thing I hate to see.

We reach the top of the hill, just as I manage to catch a glimpse of the three dragon's teeth with their impaled victims. One of them starts to move and lowers itself, dropping the husk as it stands on its feet, mindless and disgusting.

"What did those geth do to them?" Ash cries.

The other two spikes lower the bodies and they too stand up, swaying left and right like as if they had no idea what was going on around them. I'd never played zombie games before, but if there was a best way to describe these horrible walking nightmares, I'd have to say they're like Runners from The Last of Us. Choking and gasping like as if they were sucking in every breath of air that could be their last.

Then, as if they had caught our scent, they turn their heads in our direction and one of them widens its stance, mouth open, eyes alight with that sickening bluey glow. The next thing I know, they charge like as if they had gone mad from just a simple smell, arms swinging wildly from side to side. As they draw closer, their bodies start to spark with bright blue electricity.

"Stay away from them!" I cry without really thinking. "They look like they want to shock us!"

Shepard nods as he and the rest of us begin to back up away from the husks. He turns to Kaidan and orders him, "Use your biotics!"

Kaidan nods and once again flares up, bringing both hands together and unleashing a Throw at the zombielike creatures, knocking them onto their backs a short distance away.

"Fire!" Shepard commands.

We don't hesitate and we begin to fire on them.

One of the husks manages to get back on its feet, its throat gurgling. It then once more rushes at us, bypassing the bullets from Ash... and makes a lunge for me. I let out a startled cry of alarm as I go down on my back, keeping my arms raised in front of my face to keep it back. I felt my pistol fly from out of my grasp just as the husk throws its face into my own, trying to bite my face off.

"Stay back you bastard!" I squeal, struggling to keep it at bay.

"Clarissa!" I hear someone shout.

The husk throws back a hand and makes a swipe at my left cheek, its sharp claws tearing through flesh. I feel hot blood flow from the set of wounds and I nearly scream in shock as I felt pain for the first time since my arrival.

Before the husk could get another go at me, a bullet pierces through its skull and it falls on top of me.

I frighteningly pull away from the now dead husk. My entire body trembles as the husk lies dead like any other corpse would.

I glance to one side and see the other two husks lying dead on the ground. "Holy shit..." I gasp as Kaidan rushes over to my side. He offers a hand out to me and I gratefully take it, still trembling from the incident. I felt like I wanted to throw up again right now, but I hold back the urge to do so. I don't want to appear too weak for their taste. I look up at Kaidan, sighing, "Thanks for the save."

"You're welcome," Kaidan says, frowning as he hands me my pistol back and takes my face, looking me over. "Shit, Clarissa, you're bleeding all over your clothes."

I touch the spot where the husk had scratched me and I sense of touch picks up burning hot blood, followed by a stinging sensation that almost made me want to cry. Goddamnit, woman, get a hold of yourself! Don't cry just because it stings like an absolute bitch.

"Hold still," Kaidan tells me as he pulls something from out of his belt and slaps on cool medi-gel on my face. I sigh in relief. That felt so much better than I had hoped. I could feel the shock of the attack slowly wearing off, but not by uneasiness.

Deep down, I am hoping that I don't end up like a useless piece of dead weight to the team.

With the other husks dead thanks to the response of the team, I have no idea exactly why the other one got lucky enough to recover quickly and come for me. What the hell is up with enemies coming for me? What did I do to get their attention?

Ash comes running up to us, worry flashing across her face. "Shit, Clarissa, I'm so sorry for not getting there in time. That thing came too fast for me to respond."

I shrug in response. "Don't worry about it," I smile in a friendly way. "I'll try and do better next time."

"You alright?" Shepard asks as he too comes up beside Kaidan.

"A little shaken," I answer, rubbing my arm that I had used to keep the husk back. It felt really numb for some reason. "But it's nothing that a warm shower cannot fix."

Shepard nods and we make our way over to the set of buildings, one of them seemed to be on fire, followed with debris and human bodies lying scattered underneath the pieces of metal. Seeing those bodies made me want to puke again, but I resist the urge to try. Instead, I focus my vision on something else. Perhaps seeing what Shepard's morality was like seemed an ideal thing.

"Maybe we should look in that building for some supplies?" I suggest, pointing at the building on the left. I feel kind of silly for suggesting such an idea, but it would be a good idea to see what Shepard thinks when we run into those scientists.

"Sounds like a good idea," Shepard agrees with a hint of a smile and approaches the door.

Unfortunately, said door was locked.

Shepard lets off a sigh as he waved his omni-tool over the door, trying to figure it out. He shook his head and slapped on some omni-gel. He then began the hacking sequence. We would've waited for a few minutes if he hadn't figured it out so quickly. The door opens and I hear a gasp from inside. We walk in and find Dr. Warren and Manuel standing nervously in the far corner.

"Humans," whispers the woman. "Thank the Maker."

God, I definitely know that was a reference to BioWare's other game known as Dragon Age: Origins. Anyone would be able to see that.

"Close the door," Manuel nervously orders, stepping forward while fiddling with his hands, "before they come back!"

"Don't worry, you're safe now," Shepard says in a reassuring manner.

Oh Primus, here we go. I'm not in the mood to listening. In fact, I was so not into it I didn't catch the rest of the conversation until I heard Manuel mention about if it was madness to see the future, to see the destruction rushing towards us, to understand that there is no escape, no hope. Alright, now I know I was tempted once to punch him (and I did that), but I felt bad after that.

I roll my eyes just as I notice Dr. Warren shaking her head from Manuel's rambles. "I gave him an extra dose of his meds before the attack," she says.

Ok, this is where Shepard's option to punch the guy comes in.

Instead, Shepard just nods and looks over his shoulder at me and Ash. "Clarissa, Ash, take us to the spaceport."

Wait, I'm helping Ash to lead them to the spaceport? I think I felt my heart increase its speed again, but I manage a weak nod. But as we turn to leave, I could just make out Manuel's last words.

"No one can stop the darkness!"

That was the darkness that I knew all too well. If only they knew how the story was going to end from here.

Ash and I take the lead with Shepard and Kaidan close behind, leaving the scientists safe in their building in case anymore geth decided to come along and put them on the dragon's teeth. But as we make our way down the hill we all heard the loud gunshot that echoed across the valley below.

It had happened.

Nihlus had been killed.

I say nothing to voice my concern, even though Shepard and the others discuss about the noise they heard. What could I say to them? That their turian companion was dead and I did nothing to stop it? What kind of person does that make me if I couldn't stop someone from dying? Ugh, there was just times when I hated feeling so helpless. My soft spot for turians just made the shooting all the more painful for my heart as I felt it throb.

As we reach the bottom of the hill, I manage to spot the massive Reaper that was slowly beginning to lift up from near the spaceport, red lightning crackling and flashing all around its body as it took off into the atmosphere, never to been seen again until the climax of the game.

"What was that thing?" I hear Kaidan ask, just as I manage to spot a series of husks and geth in the distance heading straight towards us.

"No time for questions!" Ash snaps over the moaning husks. "Time for shooting!"

I don't know what happened next, but all I knew was that I was deeply angry for not being able to save Nihlus when I could. I found myself unclasping my sniper and putting the scope to my eye, despite my blurry vision. I aim for the closest geth that I could see and fire a single shot at it, hitting it in the chest and causing its shields to drop massively. And my weapon began to overheat from the single shot.

Saren was going to pay dearly for what he had done to Nihlus!

I think I heard the others attacking as well because the familiar noise of Kaidan using his biotics to knock the husks off their feet, even straining a bit to lift the geth off the ground as well. Shepard and Ash fire their assault rifles, finishing them off with ease unlike me, where my weapon was still trying to cool down from its single shot.

I really, really could use some upgrades right now.

The familiar sound of cool air coming from my sniper's barrel signalled me that it had cooled down enough for me to fire again. I raise the scope to my eye again and fire another shot at the same geth. I watched with glee as white liquid spouted from its head as it goes down.

"Yeah, headshot!" I announce excitedly.

With the rest of the geth and husks lying dead on the ground, we then run down the hill towards the platform. And as we turn the corner, I really wished I had stayed behind to avoid this.

There, lying on the ground in a sprawled up heap was the familiar body of a turian that no player would ever get to know: Nihlus Kryik.


	3. Dawn of the End

Chapter 3: Dawn of the End

**I apologise for the lateness of the chapter. I was feeling under pressure because of how much people were putting me on favourites and alerts left and right. Because of that, I was unsure about how to proceed with this chapter. But thanks to talking with a friend, I ran with something entirely different rather than what I had originally planned like most people seemed to have.**

**Rather than have the whole "I'm here for a reason" kind of thing, it's gonna be something that I hope is good enough for people to enjoy and not think that this "woman self-insert" is annoying to anyone. I'll do my best, but there's this fear that's holding me back, preventing me from doing what I think is good.**

**I've been in the Transformers fandom for a long time, so being in the Mass Effect universe is a whole new level of unfamiliar.**

**So if anything feels off to you people, just don't hesitate to let me know. Please.**

* * *

We look down upon the body of Nihlus Kryik and I cannot help but feel sadness swelling deep inside the pit of my gut. Then, it turned into bitter hate, hot and raw, powerful and dangerous like a wild animal ready to snap at any given moment. Saren was going to pay dearly for what he did to this poor bastard. I hardly noticed that my hands had clenched into fists until I felt my nails beginning to sink into my skin, causing my knuckles to turn white.

I unclench them and shake my head. No turian deserves a cruel and gruesome death like this, especially not Nihlus whom we barely even get to know.

Without even bothering to look at the others, I kneel next to the body and use my fingers to close his glazed eyes into a more peaceful sleep. Just the feeling of wanting to do that made it feel it was respectful. Great things had been said about him, and a turian deserves so much more than a death like this.

I don't know how I knew, but I felt like there were eyes boring into the back of skull. I turn my head and see the human soldiers were obviously surprised that I would do that for a turian. Shepard's face, however, is impassive much to my confusion. Kaidan looks dumbfounded and Ash has the coldest glare I'd ever seen. I somehow recall the conversations in the game that she just doesn't trust aliens, especially turians. But I hardly care what they think and I'm not going to tell them it was because I always loved turians.

I take a deep breath. "Shepard, can we take the body back to whatever ship you came on to that we can give him back to the turians?" I ask.

I could've sworn I saw a faint curl of his lips. "I don't see why not," he answers.

Ash's eyes look like they might pop out of her skull, but she seems to hold her tongue enough to not question Shepard's decision.

I smile back at Shepard. "Thank you."

The quietness was cut short when Kaidan suddenly shouted, "Something's behind the crates!"

Feeling paranoid myself, we all turn and aim our pistols at the crates behind us. Even though I knew who it was, the movement still made me nervous because of just how much I've experienced so far. We watch as a human male with a hat that reminds of me of those beanies comes out from behind the crates, his appearance looked terrified and uncertain, maybe even a little traumatised beyond certain belief. His arms were held up in surrender as he came out.

"Wait, don't shoot!" he begs as he comes out, eyes wide with fear.

Shepard scowls coldly, "Sneaking up on us like that nearly got you killed!" he growls.

"Sorry," the man says, and we lower our weapons, though I feel really uncomfortable about having to put it away like this. I cannot help but glance in the direction where the geth were soon to appear if we walked around that corner. "I'd been hiding from those creatures. My name is Powell."

I motion to Nihlus' body with a wave of my arm. "Do you know what happened to him?" I ask, even though I already knew the answer.

"Yeah," Powell answers, rubbing the back of his neck nervously, "another turian killed the poor bastard. They appeared to have known each other, said his name was Saren or something like that. Your turian friend lowered his guard and Saren shot him right in the back."

I could've sworn I saw anger flash across Shepard's eyes, but I might've been mistaken. "Can you tell me which direction Saren went?" he asks.

"Yeah," Powell replies, pointing down the ramp on our left, "he jumped on a cargo train and headed for another platform at the far end of the spaceport."

Shepard nods. "Thanks for your help; you should get out here while you still can."

Powell nods and begins to make his way off the platform. However, I could've sworn I heard him muttering to himself about sleeping on the job. I'd better not say anything about that otherwise Ash would get a little more pissed than I bargained for.

I cannot help but glance over at Shepard. "He's a lucky man," I say.

"I agree," Ash says. "It could've been worse for him if he had been seen."

"Got that right," Kaidan agrees, folding his arms across his chest. "But we can discuss it later. I suggest that we get down to the platform before Saren gets away."

"Good idea," Shepard says, determination washing over his face, his eyes turning into a frown and his lips straightening. "Let's get going."

At least it proves that Shepard is a Paragon, but I have high hopes that he isn't a full on pussy of a Paragon. Good lord that would so not be cool if that happened.

We move upward to the ramp, but before we reached the corner, my hypersensitive hearing picks up footsteps around the corner. I stop and wave a hand at Shepard, causing him to stop and look at me. I put a hand to my ear and then point at the corner, signalling to him that I had heard something. He nods and motions to Ash and Kaidan to move up and take a look, pulling out his pistol just in case.

Ash and Kaidan nod and move towards the ramp, their weapons at the ready.

The moment they reached the corner, they jump back in time as a pair of geth troopers appear from out of the blue and begin firing their weapons in random directions. Some of the bullets connect with my shields and I hear warning alarms from them, telling me that they were below 100%. Even though I was prepared for this moment, it still made me jump and I utter a squeak as I duck behind some cover, waiting for my shields to recharge.

Shepard was standing a little closer to me, probably to provide me some form of protection (at least I don't hope so). But I don't decide to hold back as I use my pistol to shoot at the closest geth, pelting it with bullets until its shields drop down much to my surprise. Kaidan charges towards it, shotgun at the ready and fires it square in the gut. It lets off an electronic squeal as its insides spray a series of white liquid and circuitry that gets all over Kaidan, some even getting on my clothes much to my displeasure.

Shepard and Ash double-team the remaining geth with their weapons, with Ash taking down its shields with her assault rifle and Shepard rushing toward it and slamming his pistol into its head. The geth makes a noise I don't quite pick up and tries to counter the blow, but Shepard ducks in time and puts his pistol to its head. He fires a single shot that causes its head to explode.

I cannot help but wince. If Wrex had been there and had killed another krogan, that would've been a whole lot messier than I want to imagine.

"Let's keep going," Shepard orders.

I have no complaints at all. I reckon we're going to be one badass of a team once we're all together.

* * *

The further down we went, the more geth we encountered. I left most of the shooting to the more experienced soldiers, but I did my best to assist them as I possibly could. We had made it down to the cargo train and now had to race to get to the end with a Destroyer geth at the far end, two shock troopers and two geth troopers making their way towards us, preventing us from getting any closer.

Knowing that a sniper rifle has an advantage of distance, I pull mine out as I duck into cover. Ash does the same and moves onto the opposite side of me, while Kaidan and Shepard went in front of us to keep the other geth away from me and Ash.

I nervously put the scope to my eye and I can just make out the blurry image of the Destroyer. I glance over to Ash and motion to the Destroyer as Shepard and Kaidan continue to provide some cover fire with their assault rifles, keeping the other geth at bay. I see her nod in response and we both raise our snipers.

The image of the Destroyer was difficult to make out, but the flashlight head gives its position away. I hold my breath, pull the trigger, and fire a single shot at it. Much to my surprise, the shot instantly takes down its shields and I almost felt like flailing with excitement, but I manage to contain myself as I duck behind my cover to allow time for my sniper to cool down. I can hear Ash's own weapon fire, followed by a geth's dying shriek that signifies she had killed it.

Ash glances over to me, a smile upon her lips. "You're getting better," she compliments me.

"Thanks," I say. I was never one to get compliments, but when I did get them it made me feel good about myself.

The firing from Kaidan and Shepard dies down and I realised they had managed to take care of the rest of the geth. I clasp my sniper onto my back, as does Ash, Kaidan and Shepard. We move out from our cover and make our way to the end of the cargo train.

Shepard steps up the controls and presses a single button that sent the train on its way to the end of the spaceport. As it moves, I take a moment to catch my breath, bending over and inhaling deeply to allow my lungs time to gather themselves from all that running and shooting.

I hadn't noticed anyone was watching me until Shepard spoke up, "How's your eyesight?"

I straighten up and blink in surprise. How did he...? I turn my head away, unable to look him in the eye like I always did whenever I felt like I was about to get lectured by my parents. I can feel Ash and Kaidan staring at me, but I don't look at them either.

"Clarissa, I understand if you don't want to talk about it," Shepard says softly. "But what I want to know is why you didn't tell us in the first place."

I finally make eye contact with him and open my mouth to speak, but my voice feels weak much to my disgust. "If I had told you, you probably wouldn't have let me come with you in the first place."

He tilts his head to one side. "Does it have something to do with avenging your parents?"

I just nod in response, not trusting myself to say a word. If he knew how close he had been to the truth, I'd have been screwed either way.

Ash and Kaidan are still looking at me, but I still refuse to look at them. Were they judging me by thinking that my impaired vision would get them killed? Did they hate me for not telling them? I will never know as we finally reach the end of the line.

As we step off, I manage to spot the first of the four bombs near the ramp. "Shepard!" I cry. Shepard rushes over to the bomb and takes a quick look at it. I can tell we have less time as the countdown read four minutes and fifty-six seconds. I watch in amazement as he quickly sets to work on disarming the charges.

Kaidan and Ash take up positions around Shepard to provide some cover fire. I do so as well, though unfortunately, my vision prevented me from shooting straight, much to my frustration. But there was no need for my assistance as Shepard finished with the charge in less than thirty seconds.

"Done!" he shouts. "Let's move up!"

We run up the ramp just as we were getting fired on by the geth. I growl in anger as I struggle to fire back, but, once again, my aim was off. Shepard starts to run across the bridge and I follow close behind on his heels while Kaidan and Ash watched our backs. Shepard turns to the left at the end of the bridge as we come across the second bomb. He kneels down and quickly sets to work on disarming it.

I let off a small scream that I managed to turn into another squeak as a bullet from one of the geth whipped right past my face. I ducked into cover and attempt to fire bullets at the geth that tried to shoot me. I still couldn't see well (I'm muttering curses here!) as I keep the geth pinned until my pistol overheats. I curse angrily and move back into cover. Once again, Kaidan and Ash provide the backup fire, keeping the enemy pinned long enough for Shepard to finish with the bomb.

In a couple of seconds, my pistol sends me the alert it's done cooling down and I pop out of the cover and I spot the geth I had been shooting at heading towards me and Shepard. Shit, shit, shit! I try to fire again, but the geth moved way too fast for my liking.

It charged straight towards me and wrapped its arms around my body, trying to knock me off my feet. I struggle in an attempt to dislodge it, keeping my feet pinned to the ground, but it threw the butt of its assault rifle into my face and I feel nothing but mind-blowing pain spread throughout my face.

Damnit, I think my nose got broken!

I manage to bypass as much of the pain as I possibly could, despite my vision being blurred with tears, and throw a punch directly into its stomach, more pain now shooting through my hand as I made contact with its metallic frame. The geth made a strange noise, as though it was laughing at my pain. I hiss and let off a kick underneath its feet and it falls to the ground. In an attempt to keep it down, I quickly aimed my pistol at its chest and fired as quickly as I could until it no longer moved.

I clutch my face and whimper in pain as my fingers made contact with flesh. First day on the job and this is the second time I've got myself hurt! Pain is not fun, m'kay?

I make out Shepard through my tears of pain getting up after finishing with the bomb and he turns to me. He winces when he saw my face. "Thanks for keeping it off me," he says. "I wish we had time to fix your nose, but we don't. Let's get going to the next one."

"Don't worry about it, Shepard," I say as I run alongside him to the first alcove on the left with Ash and Kaidan following close behind. "No time to waste on a bloody nose." A part of me wishes that I had medi-gel on me, but I can't complain except for the pain going through my face.

We reach the third tightly closed bomb and Shepard once again works to turn it off and render it harmless. Again, I am amazed at just how fast Shepard can work on these things. But I guess that's all part of the N7 training he went through to get to this point. We continue to provide some cover fire until he was done in twenty seconds this time. He must be getting faster!

We move down the platform to the final bomb and Shepard gets onto it.

Despite my broken nose, I do the best that I can to keep any of the geth away from Shepard while Ash and Kaidan keep the enemy pinned down long enough to finish them off for good.

"That's the last of it," Shepard announces just as Kaidan lifts the final geth into the air with his biotics and Ash blasts it to pieces with her assault rifle.

I glance down at the bomb and see that the countdown had just two minutes and thirty seconds to spare. Wow, he really is fast! It would be nice to see if I can get some training like that in the military. Although I'm not sure what I planned to do once this whole Saren thing gets sorted out.

"That was too close for comfort," I say with a grin. "You sure know how to work fast under pressure."

Shepard grins back. "Believe me, once you get in the military, you're trained to do things like this."

"Noted," I reply.

"Let's get to the beacon," Shepard orders us. He leads the way down the ramp at the back of the spaceport, though I've got this nagging feeling at the back of my head that it's not going to be all that easy. We're halfway down the ramp when the familiar moaning and clicking reach my ears.

"Ah crap," I mutter underneath my breath. "I hate those things!"

And just as I thought, two geth and two husks come rushing up to meet us head on. Kaidan responds by using his Throw, knocking all four off their feet at once. The geth shriek and the husks wail as they land on their backs and struggle to get back up.

I concentrate all my firepower on the closest geth in order to finish it off for good. Several shots hit it square in the chest and it goes down. But I was forced to take cover as the second geth makes a recovery and fires at my shields, causing them to go down. Shepard and Ash take down the rest of them as they move down the ramp and onto the platform. Ash uses her shotgun on a husk, and it explodes in a wave of gore and blue energy, some of it getting on her pink and white armour, but it doesn't seem to bother her too much. Shepard whips out his assault rifle and blasts the last geth and husk into a million pieces.

"Holy shit," I say as the last husk falls to the ground in a blue and gray bloodied heap. "I really, really hate those things."

I put my pistol away back into its holster, knowing that there was nothing else to worry about anymore for the rest of the mission. I watch as Shepard and the others do the same and I shoot a death glare at the disgusting remains of the husk. I hope we really don't have to face more of these things for the rest of the investigation, but I know we'll be seeing a lot more in the not too distant future.

"You and me both," Ash jokes with a friendly smirk as we draw near to the glowing beacon.

I wisely keep my distance from it, knowing that I don't intend to be near the thing when it goes crazy. I can hear Shepard radioing the _Normandy _for pick up as Kaidan and Ash go in for a little closer look at it. I always felt I was the cautious one in my family, so I knew better.

Seemingly seeing that there was nothing more he could do, Kaidan turns and approaches me. "Hey, kid," he greets softly. "Are you alright? You look a look a little nervous."

"I'm fine," I answer, still keeping my eye on the beacon. "I just... feel a little bit tense after all this crap today." I subconsciously feel for my nose and wince at the pain. "Guess that geth really beat the shit out of me back there."

"Don't worry," Kaidan smiles kindly, "I'm sure Doctor Chakwas can take a look at it once we get back to the ship." He looks back over to the Commander for a moment and then back at me. "Listen, about when Shepard guessed about your impaired vision, I wish to say I'm sorry for not saying anything about it when you got uncomfortable."

I lift an eyebrow. "You are?"

He nods. "Yeah, I just wasn't sure what to say. I can understand you wanting to help us figure out what's going on with the beacon and Saren, but if you had told us sooner, we'd still let you come with us. Only we'd just be watching your back a bit more."

I bow my head, not looking him in the eye. I feel a tad bit guilty for not saying anything sooner, but I just didn't want to look weak in front of them and have them watch my back every five seconds. "I just didn't want to be a burden to you," I say.

He shook his head. "You're not a burden to us, Clarissa. As a team, we're meant to look out for each other, no matter what happens, even if they've got a mental or physical disability. Besides, we can fix up your eyesight when we get back on the _Normandy_."

I lift my head up, blinking in surprise. "You really mean that?"

He grins. "Yup, you won't have to worry about not being able to see properly after that."

'Don't hug him, don't hug him,' I mentally tell myself over and over again. I suspect I knew how the doctor could fix up my eye problem, though I wonder if that kind of surgery still exists in this time frame. It was probably best that I not ask until I talk with her myself.

I look over Kaidan's shoulder and I can see Ash getting in closer to the beacon. Then, the glowing intensifies and she was suddenly being pulled towards it.

"Ash!" I shout in alarm and Kaidan turns just in time to see Shepard rush to her aide. He wraps both arms around her waist and tosses her aside just as the beacon lifts him up into the air.

I can only image the flashes of images going across his eyes right at this very moment.

I see Ash try to go and help him, but Kaidan and I manage to grab her, preventing her from going near him. "Don't touch him!" Kaidan orders sternly. "It's way too dangerous."

Then the beacon explodes and Shepard falls to the deck. I watch as Kaidan and Ash approach his side just as I spot the _Normandy_ coming into full view to pick us up.


	4. Going Under

Chapter 4: Going Under

**Well, the last round of the last chapter really made things easier for me. So since we're now dealing with being on board the **_**Normandy**_**, it's gonna be a little hard for me to do things. I'm hoping I've got Joker's character right because he is one of the most amusing and most sarcastic characters I've ever seen in the franchise. Again, if anything is amiss, please let me know. I still need to get used to some characters like Doctor Chakwas and Captain David Anderson.**

**Also, futuristic laser eye surgery! That will prove to be an interesting challenge.**

**And hopefully the asari food Kaidan cooks up is... about right. I'm not sure what all alien recipes are like, so I made this up based on what Mess Sergeant Gardner says about some asari food being a little bit cannibalistic when you fetch him some high quality ingredients in ME2. Remember, these are all just guesses, ok? Alien food is a weird subject to approach. So if anyone knows any alien recipes in the Mass Effect universe, holler please. It would be fun to see what kind of foods Clarissa gets to try that hopefully doesn't involve her puking her guts out (kill her with dextro foods? Haha, I kid, I kid).**

**Moving on now.**

* * *

"Clarissa, if you don't hold still, I'm not going to be able to fix your nose," Doctor Chakwas berates me as I pull away from her third attempt to try and correct my broken nose.

I couldn't help myself. I've always afraid of broken bones, and having one of these myself is not how I really want to spend my life. But since I'm here now and helping out Shepard and his crew for the time being, it seems I'm in going to have to just grin and bear it. But every time she put her hand close to my face, I always feel this instinct to just not want to go through with the pain.

"I can't keep still," I complain, "I don't like pain."

Her eyes softened sympathetically. "It will all be over once the cartilage is put back into place," she says kindly.

I tremble, but I knew she was right. What else could I do if it was just a broken piece of my face? Probably not complain at most, but this was my first time of hurting myself badly, at least not since I twisted my ankle when I was still in school many years ago. Least 170 years ago before all this stupid shit happened to me in one bloody night.

I emit a deep sigh, "I'm scared..."

"Hush now," she replies as she went over to a cabinet and starts searching amongst her tools and other things that she might have in there. She pulls out a familiar looking object that I recognise as a needle and a tiny brown bottle filled with a clear liquid in it. She shakes the bottle for a moment and then sticks the tip of the needle in cap, filling it up with what I thought was clear was actually a pale blue. It reminds me of the same colour blue as the energon crystals in both Beast Wars and Transformers Prime.

Huh, coincidence perhaps?

Once the needle was pull, she approaches my side and gently takes my left arm in her hand. I gulp nervously and look away. I'm not really in the mood to see myself get pricked by a needle, especially not now. I really hate needles but I'm not exactly afraid of them either.

I feel something puncture itself directly into my skin and I almost pull away from the contact. Now was not the time to be a scaredy-cat!

For some reason, I don't feel anything at all after that until the slight sting of something being pulled out of my skin tells me that it was all over. I glance back and saw a smiling Chakwas cleaning up the needle with a cloth before she put it down on a table and stood in front of me again.

"The anaesthetic should kick in right about... now."

What is she talking about? I don't feel anything going through my veins at all. Should I get a sense of something happening in my system?

"Are you ready now?" she asks with a small smile.

It seems that I don't have any other choice but to at least trust her word. I just nod in response, not trusting my throat to speak for me. No matter how hard would I try, I could never be prepared for what happened next. She quickly grabbed my nose, though my sense of touch doesn't feel her fingers on my face, and she twists so roughly that pain shot through my face and I let off a squeal, and tears starting to blur my vision. I clutch my face, trying to blink away the burning liquid in my eyesight.

"I thought you said it had kicked in!" I growl, still clutching my face and tightly closing my eyes.

"It did," she answers. "It just doesn't exactly dull everything you know. The pain has to be there in order for me to know that it worked. Do you feel any more pain?"

I carefully brush my fingers over my nose to give her the diagnosis. All I could detect was a lot of discomfort and perhaps even some minor pain, although nothing that I couldn't quite handle. "A bit," I answer. "But it shouldn't be a problem now."

"You may still need a cast in order to keep the bones together," she says, patting me on the shoulder and then uses a cloth to help dry my still teary eyes and the dried blood. But she seems to be mindful of my nose. "You were very brave though. Usually some people tend to act like cry babies, but they learn to toughen up."

She applies medi-gel across my nose and then gently puts on a small plastic cast over my nose.

In all my life, I've never experienced something like this before, but a part of me is glad that we have doctors and medics like Chakwas to make things better, though that is probably putting it mildly.

"Thank you," I say and her lips pull further up into a warm smile.

"You're welcome."

My gaze shifts over to the still unconscious body of Shepard. The poor guy has been lying there since Kaidan and Ash had carried him onto the _Normandy_. He hasn't woken up since he got hit by the beacon and Doctor Chakwas had been monitoring him closely for a little while, especially on his brain wave activity. I knew what was going on in there, and those Prothean visions can be really freaky to me at times. Seeing dead aliens, machine bits and Reapers are not pretty.

"Will he be alright?" I ask, not tearing my eyes off him.

"To be honest, I don't know," she says as her voice drops to an unusually quiet level. What? Did she expect him to be a coma forever? Dear me, someone needs to look more on the bright side of things. "His brain wave activity is so... extraordinary. I've never seen anything like it before."

She turns and approaches her computer desk. "But that is not the focus at the moment."

"Pardon?" I question, lifting an eyebrow.

"Could you tell me your name?"

"Uh, Clarissa Kaye," I answer, fidgeting with my hands nervously. Good lord, I hate tests, especially questions about my personal life.

She typed on the keyboard in response. "What is your date of birth and where were you born?"

Shit, I didn't really think about that one. I knew I should make something up, but still keep it mildly true. The half-truth seems logical enough for this point. "10th of March, 2161. I was born on Eden Prime, but my parents came from Australia back on Earth. They moved to Eden Prime, but they didn't tell me when."

"That explains your accent," she says, once again typing away in reply to my answer. She then nods thoughtfully and turns her head back to me. "Why did you go through gene therapy to fix up your eyes or your mental problems when you were born?"

I hesitate, unsure how to respond to such a question. I grind my jaw and lie through my teeth once more. "My parents wanted me to grow up naturally," I explain. "They had me see better by giving me glasses."

She frowns. "Glasses have not been used since the twenty-first century. Your parents must've been filthy rich to have given you those."

I quietly gulp, saying, "My family has always loved the twenty-first century. They kept things from it, but they never sold anything at all unless they needed the money."

She nods once more and continues to type away on the keyboard. There was a beeping sound and she turns her eyes over to me. "Well, it seems your words were right about your profile."

Wait, what was she talking about? I shake my head. "My profile?" I ask. "What do you mean?"

She swivelled the computer around in my direction so that I could get a better look at it. There was a photograph of myself: shoulder length mousy brown hair, purple-blue glasses covering nervous green eyes, which stare right back at me. How did that even get there? I never existed in this universe, so why is there a profile of me on the data base? It didn't make any sense at all!

"Having an autistic spectrum disorder," Chakwas speaks up, interrupting my thoughts, "is extremely rare amongst your generation, especially for women like yourself. Some men usually have only the high functioning level." She puts a hand to her chin, looking thoughtful for a moment. "We can still correct your disability if you wanted to with gene therapy back on the Citadel, but then you wouldn't be yourself, and it is expensive. However, I can correct your myopia with the good old-fashioned laser eye surgery."

Did she just say 'surgery'? Crap, how am I going to explain I have this huge phobia of going under the knife? I mean, it's not that surgeries don't bother me, I just don't like being wide awake for them.

I emit a sigh. "I'm... not good with surgeries," I tell her, looking down at my hands that were starting to tremble from the images going through my brain.

"You won't feel a thing," she says soothingly. "Even though you'll be awake, it's just a small beam of light that will shoot out of this," she motions to the mechanical arm above my head, "and into your eye, one at a time for several minutes. It would have to go over both your eyes once more after the first shot to make sure that everything is correct. Do not worry, you won't feel a thing at all, but I'll give you a relaxant to keep you calm and quiet. All you have to do is focus on what is in front of you and to try and not blink."

I wriggle out of discomfort, but I don't argue. If I want to help Shepard out on the missions and not be a burden to the team with my terrible eyesight, then I have to go through with this. Why am I always scared of things that I've never even tried before, especially things that used to be back in my time and dimension?

"There is one thing," she says, getting my attention once more. "I can't exactly do the surgery right now because the equipment isn't set up. I'll start prepping up now. It should be ready in less than an hour or so."

"What can I do in the meantime?" I ask.

"Well, we're not due to arrive at the Citadel for at least another sixteen hours, so you can start by seeing Captain Anderson. He's been waiting to meet you since the end of the mission."

"Ok, I'll do that," I nod and slowly pick myself up off the berth. I wouldn't need to worry about directions since I know the inside and outside of the _Normandy_ like the back of my hand. "I'll see you in an hour, Doctor."

"Until then, Clarissa," she says and returns to her computer.

* * *

I now stand before the captain's private cabin where it will soon become Shepard's once we all set out to go and take down Saren. I haven't gone to get something to eat, even though I can feel my stomach growling loudly in demand for food it. My thirst was even making my throat dry, probably a little too dry for me to even talk to the Anderson. I know he's a nice guy, especially since he's Shepard's mentor. But I don't know, I'm a bit uneasy about meeting him face to face with no TV or computer screen to divide us.

I inhale deeply in an attempt to calm my nerves, and then exhale. He can't be all that bad? I'm aware he has a dislike for Udina, so we have one thing in common I guess.

I summon up my courage and knock on the door, gulping as I waited for that one familiar word to let me know permission was granted to enter. This is kind of like when a random Autobot is about to be on the receiving end of Optimus' wrath as soon as he walks into his office, just the calm before the storm thing, I guess. But this meeting with Anderson doesn't feel like it at all.

Since I have no stuff to bring aboard the _Normandy_, I have absolutely nothing but the two weapons and the grubby clothes on my back. Perhaps the captain wants to talk to me about that and my wanting to help them with their investigation.

Suddenly, the door opens and I jump back in fright at the peaceful whooshing noise. What the actual flying fuck? I thought the word 'enter' was supposed to happen first! Not cool, mate!

I glance around the room as I slowly walk in. Yup, the same old cabin with the same old things: bed, two computer desks on the opposite sides of the room, shower, and a table with two chairs in the middle on my right. While it's so familiar, it's also... different.

Anderson is sitting at the middle table, looking at a datapad in his hand and a glass of water on his left side.

Here goes nothing. It's a massive step into what could be the start of my new life with no looking back.

I clear my throat to get his attention and he shifts his gaze over to me, putting the datapad down on the table in front of him. "Clarissa, good to see you at long last," he says with a warm smile and then motions to the chair in front of him. "Sit down here please so that we may talk properly."

I just stand there nervously, fiddling with my hands out of a subconscious habit.

He must've picked it up because his tone takes a softer approach. "It's alright, you have nothing to worry about."

I sigh as I let loose my tight muscles. "Yes, sir," I say and took my seat before him.

"You don't have to call me sir," he chuckles. "At least not until you're in the military." He pushed the glass of water in front of me. "Thirsty?"

"Very," I reply as I took the surprisingly cold glass in my hand and gulp its contents in one gulp. "Doctor Chakwas said that you wanted to see me for something."

Anderson places both hands on the table and leans forward a bit, looking me straight in the eye though I struggle to keep his gaze. I really need to practise more on making eye contact. "I've been looking at your data file after you presented the Commander with your offer to assist us. While I'm amazed at your will to help, even though you've had no training whatsoever, I am impressed with your first time at using a gun. However, if you were to help, you not be allowed on a mission until you receive the proper training that could take years, time that we don't exactly have at the moment."

"I might not be experienced with a gun," I protest, "and visually impaired, but I know how to hold my own."

"If that were the case," Anderson responds firmly like a father with a child, "you'd still put the ground team in danger, something that we can't afford."

I slump back in my chair, defeated by his words. He was right. I was pretty much useless if I didn't know how to shoot a gun properly. But... perhaps things would improve with the laser eye surgery? I open my mouth to say so, but Anderson beats me to the punch.

"But," he says, "we may make an acceptation just this once because of your knowledge and disability. With the right training from the officers like Ms. Williams and Mr. Alenko, we can get the training done in less time. That is if you have the right attitude about it."

I blink in surprise. Was he... letting it go? Was he going to go behind his superiors' backs? Did he see something different about me?

"I... I am more than happy to give it a try by rising to the challenge, sir," I stutter.

"As I've told you before, Clarissa, you're not in the military yet. But once we reach the Citadel to present the Council our findings of what happened down on Eden Prime we can get you some proper belongings and gear."

I fiddle with the single credit chit in my pocket. I pray that it will be enough for me to get what I need.

"Thank you for everything and giving me this chance to help out," I smile gratefully as we both stand up and shake hands. "I'll make you proud."

Then I pause for a moment. Wait, maybe there was something I could do after this is all over. "Hey, once all is said and done, I might think about joining the Alliance."

Anderson's eyes widen. Was he surprised by my idea? Did he think I was crazy? I have no idea, but it seems to have passed because his expression changed again to an impassive one. "If it all works out," he says, "I'll see if I can put you forward for training."

He looks at the datapad on the table.

"In all my life," he went on, looking back at me, "I've never met such an unusual woman like you. Have you ever known what Earth is like?"

Once again, the number of lies begins to pile further up on my plate. "I've heard stories about it from my parents and that they said it was beyond beautiful, enough to be missed."

He nods in agreement. "You should get going now. Doctor Chakwas will be ready for you soon."

"I'll be sure to go there soon after I get something to eat," I reply. "I haven't eaten since the attack."

"Of course, you have plenty of time before we arrive on the Citadel," he says. "Oh, and before I forget, you'll be sleeping in the women's quarters. And be sure to have a warm shower, you'll feel much better after going through something like that. I've had one of my crew leave you some clean clothes on the bed you'll be sleeping in as well. I'll even have Kaidan fix you up a little something."

Somehow, a shower sounds a lot better than I could've hoped for.

"I really cannot thank you enough for your generosity," I sigh, looking away from him. "I'll find some way to repay you."

He waves a hand. "You don't have to thank me, all I ask in return is that you do your best in the future."

"You got it," I promise. "I'll see you around... uh..."

He throws his head back and laughs, but I'm going to guess it was not to make fun of me. "Just call me Anderson. It's what everybody does. Now get going before the doctor gets a bit upset about a late patient."

I didn't need to be told twice and make a beeline for the exit.

* * *

I've showered and managed to change into a new set of clothes that one of the crew members had left me on the bed as promised by Anderson: a black jacket, a white long-sleeved turtleneck top, tapered jeans, and blue and white highly efficiency sneakers with socks. I've even tied my mousy brown hair into a ponytail as I walk into the mess room.

Ash was sitting at the table, eating a sandwich of some kind. I even saw Kaidan in the kitchen area whipping up something, the smell coming from his direction was very... unusually pleasant. It smelt almost like... fish with citrus fruits and fresh herbs. Not like anything my nose has scented before.

In response to the smell, my stomach growls loudly, getting everyone's attention.

That was not how I wanted to be noticed! I bow my head in embarrassment as Kaidan laughs.

"Anderson told me to make you a little something," he grinned jokingly. "Go and sit down, it's almost ready."

I blink in surprise. I just left the office not too long ago! How long does it take to cook food in this time period?! Do they do it at a really fast speed or something?

I just nod without saying a word and sit myself across from Ash. I find myself staring off into space until Ash asks me a question. "How is Shepard doing?"

I rub my eyes and sigh for what felt like the thousandth time today since I got onboard the _Normandy_. This was beginning to become a really bad habit for me. "He's still unconscious," I answer tiredly. God I never realised how tired I am up until now. Once this whole shit is over and done with, I'm going straight to bed.

I saw a worried expression on Ash's face unlike anything I'd seen before. Man, she really must be taking it harder than I thought. I'd feel bad too if I had been in her place.

Time passed quickly before Kaidan arrives with a plate of food balancing on his hand. It was food unlike anything I ever seen before, but the smell was highly unusual. Had it been what I smelt before while he had been cooking? I watch as he places the plate in front of me, followed by a fork and knife and a glass of an orange liquid that smelled oddly like mangoes and another fruit I cannot identify.

The food was nothing like I'd seen before. There was a bunch of wriggling tentacles mixed in with green leaves that had that same smell of citrus fruits. I stare as the tentacles twitch and wiggle, making me feel sick to my stomach. Whatever this was, I'm so not trying it! I turn and glare at Kaidan like he grew an extra head and point to the plate. I'm trying so hard not to puke here, despite the sweet scent of calamari and fruit. "What is it?" I demand, trying to contain my disgust.

If Kaidan had been hurt by my question, he didn't show it. "Its asari food," he grins and he leaned on the table. "If you ask me though, it really feels kind of cannibalistic to me, what with their tentacle heads and everything."

Ash nudges the plate closer to me. "Go ahead," she smiles. "You can't afford to waste good food. Give it a try, you might like it."

I gulp loudly, having never tried alien food before. What if I didn't like it? I would probably make Kaidan look bad then and I really hate to disappoint people. Making them happy was something I like to do. I cautiously pick up the fork and stab it into one of the tentacles but I try to picture it as something like calamari that just wasn't quite dead yet.

Well... here goes nothing.

I put the food into my mouth and I'm half-expecting it to be disgusting. Much to my surprise, it was a taste unlike anything I had tasted before. It was both strange and delicious at the same time! I roll the food around in my mouth as I chew, taking in everything I can before I swallow it and turn to Kaidan.

"This is awesome!" I exclaim.

Before Kaidan or Ash could say anything, I bring the plate closer and eat it all in less than a few minutes. Man, I had never known how hungry I was until the food had touched my tongue. I even gulp down the glass's orange drink as well, savouring its beautiful flavour.

Both of them laugh and Kaidan reached forward, grabbing me around the neck and giving me a friendly noogie, much to my displeasure and embarrassment. I wriggle out of his grasp and give him my best death glare. No one makes a mess of my hair unless I say so!

"Want me to make you something else?" Kaidan asks with a broad grin on his lips.

I shake my head. "As much as that meal tasted so good, I can't," I say. "I have to go and see Doctor Chakwas again for my eye surgery."

"Ah, going under the knife are we?" Ash says with a hint of mirth in her voice. "Those are not really fun. But all you have to do is not blink and not move a single muscle as the arm goes over you."

Gee, thanks, Ash, for your vote of confidence... I'm not all that keen either. Just be glad you're not the one who is going through with it. I'd rather be sleeping than have it because it would make the time pass by faster.

I sigh and rub my forehead. "I suppose she should be finished by now," I say. "I might as well go now before I decide to delay any further."

Kaidan's face softens a little and I look away, a bit embarrassed by his look of sympathy. Now was not the time to be feeling weird before a surgery. I stand up, thanking Kaidan for making me a wonderful meal and make my way back over to the med bay where Doctor Chakwas was waiting for me. I can feel a pair of eyes watching my back but I ignore it.

As soon as the door opens and I step inside the room, the doctor looks up from her computer and smiles warmly. "Clarissa, you're just in time. I just finished setting up the equipment nearly two minutes ago. You really have good timing."

She lifts an eyebrow at the sight of my new clothes. "Whoever gave you those has good taste," she compliments.

"Thanks," I say as I straighten up my jacket.

"Alright, I think we've delayed enough," she says as she stands up with the same needle as before in her hand, motioning to the bed that was closest to the door. "Lie down on the bed please."

I do so without hesitation, forcing myself to stare up at nothing but what was above me. The familiar sensation of being pricked by the needle almost makes me flinch, but I don't pull away.

"Focus your eyes on the ceiling for me," she continues, "do not try to even blink otherwise the laser will not be able to work properly and miss its target."

I obey and try to focus my eyes on the ceiling as best as I can, the relaxant finally beginning to kick in as my muscles become loose and my brain calm and blank. However, I could still feel my heart pound furiously against my breast bone, all the while I struggle not to bat an eyelash.

Something long and mechanical with an unusual looking head swoops in front of my face, just over an inch above my eye. The head appears to have some sort of needle sticking out of it with a small hole in the middle. A red light glows in the middle of the needle's hole and drew close to my right eye. I try not to blink as it begins to making a humming noise and the red light gets brighter.

It stays above my right eye for several aching long minutes before it lifts a few inches, which gives me the chance to blink a bit, and it moves over to my left eye and does the same thing as before. After the second attempt, it moves back over to right eye and then repeats the pattern for another several minutes.

I lose track of time before it finally pulls itself up and away from me.

I blink several times as white hot tears pour from the corners of my eyes. I'm tempted to rub them, something tells me that would ruin all the hard work the laser machine had to do.

"You can sit up now," Chakwas tells me from the side.

I do so as she approaches me with something in her hand. I keep my head still as she wraps the something around my eyes until there was nothing but darkness. The relaxant was still in my systems, so I'm loose enough to not say anything about what she was doing.

"This will help give your eyes some time to adjust until they heal," she explains. "You'll have to stay in here for a few hours and the bandages will be removed. In the meantime, I suggest getting some sleep. You look exhausted."

I nod in agreement, far too tired to even say anything at all. I lean back in the bed and close my eyes.

What had felt like minutes had actually been hours by the time I open my eyes again. I stir and turn on my side, groaning about not being well rested even though I have more energy again. I sit up as I hear a pair of footsteps coming in my direction. Something takes my head and begins to undo the wrapping of the bandages, revealing a bit of a blurry image before everything comes back into focus, but it was still a bit of a blur.

Doctor Chakwas is now standing in front of me and giving me a calm looking stare. "Welcome back, Clarissa," she greets me, taking my chin in her hands and giving me a thorough examination. "Now, it will take a couple of weeks for your eyes to properly adjust, but once they've settled down, you should be alright. Some side effects like irritation and burning will be present until then and I don't recommend rubbing them at all."

I nod. "Can you give me anything for the pain?" I ask.

She looked thoughtful. "I'll give you some special pain meds," she answers and once more goes through her cabinet, pulling out a tiny box of medication. "This will not only help you calm down your overactive mind, but it will target your pain and work within half an hour after consumption. Take it when you experience any pain."

She hands over the box of medication and I take it gratefully. I'm glad to be taking the proper medication for my disability again because I can never trust myself without them.

The door to the med bay opens and Ash comes walking in. She was probably here to check up on Shepard, which means he could be waking up any moment now. I say nothing as I watch her closely, but she doesn't seem to notice either me or Chakwas. Her hands are balled up into fists and her head was bowed, her lips were straight and her eyes slightly watery.

Hmmm.

I then look over to the still unconscious Shepard, who seems to be sleeping peacefully after all that spasm in the face with his rapid eye movement.

Suddenly, his hand twitches slightly and he slowly begins to sit up.

"Doctor Chakwas," Ash cries with alarm, "he's waking up!"

Chakwas was over at the Commander's side in an instant the moment he started to move. I listen as she asks if he was alright and he gives the diagnosis of minor throbbing. Ash comes up to his side, apologising rapidly for getting in the way of the beacon.

"You've had no way that would happen," he tells her kindly, looking at her from the corner of his eyes.

A tiny smile forms on Ash's lips. It was small, but barely noticeable for me.

I sigh and look away, staring off into space. I really wasn't in the mood for the same old stuff. The only thing I could think about was my old life back at home. What had really happened to me back there? Were my parents worried about me? Did they even miss me? All these thoughts consumed my brain enough to make me miss them very much, including my siblings. It almost made me feel like crying, but I manage to contain myself, putting on the usual impassive expression I'm used to doing.

Everything's interrupted when Anderson comes walking in, requesting that he speak with Shepard alone.

I don't hesitate to take my leave, since I know how things were going to end up for us. Since I've got nothing better to do, I might as well go and check out the cockpit, maybe even meet Joker. Besides, I want to be able to see the Citadel when we reach it and I'm hopeful it's even better than how the game shows it.

* * *

I nervously weave my way around through the crew members, being mindful of their duties and to not get in their way as they work. I manage to catch a glimpse of the Galaxy Map where Shepard would soon stand to give out orders. I then walk down the hall and up behind Joker, and I'm careful to not get too close to get on his nerves and distract him while he works.

Much to my surprise, the Citadel appears to be so much more than what I expected it to be. It's long arms were halfway closed, gleaming cities and flickering ships could be seen in each one, giving it life. It was so much better than being in pixel format.

I was so focused on watching the Citadel that I didn't even realise I was in the wrong spot.

"Uh, could you move please?" Joker says awkwardly. "You're blocking the view."

"Oops!" I exclaim and back out of his personal space. God that was so awkward. "Sorry."

"Women..." I hear him mumble to himself but I make no comment about it.

"Now, now, go easy on her Joker," Kaidan's voice speaks from behind, forcing me to turn and see him, Shepard and Ash coming towards us. They were all dressed in their armour with their weapons on their backs. "She's still new to all of this you know."

Joker snorts and resumes his task as Shepard walks past me and I stand beside Ash.

"You like the view, kid?" Kaidan asks me as he looks down upon me.

I hate being short.

"Yes," I nod as I continue to stare at the massive space station. It was unlike anything I had seen before. "It's even more beautiful than I could've imagined."

Kaidan smirks as Shepard folds his arms across his chest. "Bring us in, Joker," he orders.

"You got it, sir," Joker grins as he wriggles his fingers and begins to bring in the _Normandy _to the docking station. The ride was smooth and quiet as the massive ship eases its thrusters and moves into position, the locks on the side locking it firmly into place.

I feel around my back and pocket to check to make sure I have everything with me. Sniper? Check. Pistol? Check. Credit chit? Double check. Yup, looks I'm as ready as I'll ever be.

A pat on my shoulder brings me around and Kaidan, Ash, and Shepard were gathering together at the airlock's exit. "Let's go kid, we don't want to delay any further," Ash calls.

"So you're all calling me kid now?" I joke as I hurry after the three.

"Sure, if that's the way you want it," Kaidan replies, his grin growing further. Oh, that is so not funny! Just because I was twenty-two doesn't mean I'm a kid! Someday, I'm going to get back at you all for calling me that. Oh it is so on!

"Fine then, grannies," I jest back. "I'll play your little game."

Amused looks shoot back at me, but I don't care. If they were going to call me kid, I'll just call them names until they get it right. It was probably disrespectful of me, but I don't care. I'm going to have some fun until we get inside.

"Come on," Shepard sighs, shaking his head. "Let's move out."

The airlock door opens and we make our way over to the elevator. From here on out, there was no going back. It was time to begin a whole new life with many dangers, friends, and enemies alike. Whether my stay here in this universe is permanent or not, it was going to be one heck of a ride.


	5. Welcome to Paradise

Chapter 5: Welcome to Paradise

**I apologise if this chapter is a little bit short, but I just wanted to get some stuff out of the way like a bit of training with omni-tools and getting stuff that should cover Clarissa's backside when she goes out on the field. Ugh, I forgot to mention that writing Udina is... bleh, difficult because he's a total prick. I'll be really happy once all is said and done with. We're getting close to meeting Garrus and I'm really excited about writing it.**

* * *

Shepard promises to me that we would drop around to the Emporium after this is over to pick up some supplies and me some gear. I had to admit it, but walking around the Presidium was not quite what I expected. Seeing all these aliens moving to and fro and going about their daily lives just makes me want to squeal in fangirl excitement, especially when I always found myself staring at the turians. I've always loved their kind because of their badass looking face paint and their damn flanging voices. I bet I'm going to freak out even more when we cross paths with Garrus Vakarian because... damn. But I manage to hold my composure until we walk into the office.

I manage to peek over Ash's shoulder and spot Udina talking with the holographic forms of the three Council members. None of them were not quite what I originally thought of. All three Council members were as life like and as they were in game. Even their personalities were exactly the same which almost makes me want to punch the living crap out of the turian Councillor, even though we may need him and the others in the not too distant future.

Udina points an accusing finger at them, making his usual demands which the turian – I think his name is Sparatus? – is more than happy to dismiss it all.

"You don't get to make demands of the Council, Ambassador," he growls, mandibles twitching slightly in annoyance.

"Citadel Security is investigating your charges against Saren," the asari says calmly. "We will discuss the C-Sec findings at the hearing. Not before."

With that said, the three holograms turn off and Udina mumbles something inaudible as heads over to our side. I've managed to move away from the group and head on over to the balcony to get a good view of the Presidium. It's unlike anything I've seen and the games just don't do it any justice. I can hear Udina talking before he says something that surprises me.

"What the hell is this?" I hear him say. "Why is there a civilian with you?"

What a fucking prick...

I look over my shoulder and shoot him a glare, but I wisely keep my mouth shut. If I say a word that my tongue is dying to form, then I'm going to get in some serious trouble. It would be wise to not say anything at all.

"Ashley Williams wasn't the only one who was involved in the Eden Prime incident," Shepard answers coolly, glancing over at me. "Clarissa witnessed the death of her parents at the hands of the geth. She has every right to be here to see to it that justice gets served."

For once, I'm at a loss for words.

"The ground team and Clarissa are here in case you have any questions," Anderson says as he folds his arms behind his back, glancing over at us.

I shuffle my weight out of habit.

"I have the mission reports," Udina grumbles, folding his arms across his chest. "I assume they are accurate?"

Anderson nods in response. "They are. Sounds like you convinced the Council to give us an audience."

I continue to gaze out at the Presidium, blocking out as much as I could to avoid hearing the same old song and dance. I've heard it all before, but I guess part of my memory had forgotten about some of the important bits of information. Then again, it sometimes never hurt to refresh it every once in a while just for old time's sake.

"Saren's a threat to every human colony out there," Shepard speaks up firmly. I can't really see him, but I could just imagine his hands balling up into fists and his face expression hard and determined. "He has to be stopped. The Council has to listen to us!"

Wow, he really is getting serious there. I'm hoping he's a Spacer because that background earns a lot of Paragon points there. A War Hero would be nice too, but I have my doubts.

"Settle down, Commander," Udina growls. Ok, now that was not nice! "You've already done more than enough to jeopardise your candidacy for the Spectres."

What does he want, a medal for being such a dickhead? He's reminding me way too much of the TFWiki where they often make amusing remarks about Prowl being a prick at every chance they get. Then again, this isn't joking around and Udina is really starting to get on my nerves, kind of like how Mess Sergeant Gardner's voice did.

"The mission on Eden Prime was a chance to prove you could get the job done. Instead, Nihlus ended up dead, the beacon was destroyed, and you picked up a civilian that looks more than useless."

Ok, fuck this!

I whirl upon him, not caring if I'm stepping out of line or not. "Listen here, _Ambassador_," I hiss, turning my hands into fists. "First of all, I'm not useless! Second, why don't you go and shove your attitude right up your ass along with that stick that's already up there!"

Udina shoots me the biggest glare that I've ever seen. If his eyes could shoot laser beams from their irises, I'd be a pile of ash right now. "You're just going to let this civilian disrespect me?" he demands, turning to Anderson and Shepard.

"Clarissa, stand down," Shepard orders firmly in a tone that reminds me of a father berating a child. "We'll discuss about it later."

I snort and fold my arms across my chest, still glaring back at Udina, but he's no longer looking at me. While he does that, I give him the middle finger. Yeah, yeah, it was very immature of me but after reading way too many fanfics involving it happening, why the heck not. I notice Shepard, Kaidan and Ash were trying to keep a straight face as I put my finger away, grinning happily. I have a gut feeling that none of them like Udina as much as I do.

"Come with me, Captain," Udina says to Anderson. "I want to go over a few things before the hearing."

He then turns to Shepard.

"Shepard – you and the others can meet us in the Citadel Tower. Top level. I'll make sure you have clearance to get in."

As we walk out of the office behind Shepard, I hear Ash mumble about hating politicians. I agree, you and me both sister. I cannot help but feel proud of myself for standing up to that asshole, but I knew it was probably a very stupid thing for me to do. I might've got on the bad side of Shepard as we stop and he turns to face me with a stern look in his face and... Was that a smile on his lips?

"Didn't think someone like you would be able to stand up to that asshole's attitude," he smirks at me.

I blink, feeling baffled by his words. "You mean you hate him too?" I ask.

"Everyone hates him," Kaidan replies. "I was going to say something back for the way how he talked about you, but you beat me to the punch. I'm impressed, kid."

I rub the back of my neck sheepishly. "Thanks, I guess."

Ash nods and then smiles, looking me up and down at the clothes I was currently wearing. "Let's go and get you some gear," she says. "You can't go out on a mission with just those on. Plus you need better weapons than what you already have."

I feel my back where my sniper was. I think she's right. No doubt these weapons would need to be sold for something stronger than what I already had, even if they were the first ones I used on Eden Prime. I just hope there were enough credits on this single chit to help me pay for the things I would need.

"Sure, why not," I agree nervously as I shrug my shoulders.

Shepard pulls out a credit chit from his pocket in his armour as well. He looks at it thoughtfully. "We'll need to buy some supplies anyway," he says as he looks up at us. "Let's head down to the Emporium and see what we can find."

We make our way out of the Embassies and head out onto the fairly busy streets. Again, I cannot help but admire the peaceful look of this beautiful place. It was much different compared to the often busy streets of my home town. Watching salarian, turian, hanar, and asari walk past us as we cross the bridge to get to the other side made me want to stare and admire their alien designs.

"You look like you haven't seen an alien before," Kaidan says, startling me from out of my staring. I hadn't meant to stare every time we walked past a random turian or asari, but I just found them all so fascinating.

I shake my head as I rush to keep up with their long strides. "It's my first time seeing an alien," I tell him honestly. "I've only seen them in pictures back in school and nothing more. The pictures never did them any justice."

Kaidan smirks and I found my cheeks beginning to heat up from embarrassment. I always found Transformers interesting as well, being alien robots and all that stuff, so why not the Mass Effect aliens as well? If anyone even knew that I was way more interested in aliens than humans, god that would be so awkward.

What I didn't expect was the hanar shopkeeper who greeted us with a friendly wave of its long tentacle. "Greetings, humans," it said in what sounded like a male voice. I think its name was Delan if memory served correctly. "Can this one interest you in any specific items?"

"Yes, please," Shepard says, handing the hanar a datapad containing the items he required.

"Ah, these shouldn't be too hard to find," Delan replies and moves around the back to find what the Commander required. I wriggle about nervously as the large jellyfish alien's tentacles went about in different directions, pulling out three boxes. "Were these the ones you were after?"

Shepard peers at the boxes carefully and nods. "Yes, thanks for that. Could you have them delivered to the _Normandy_ at Dock 422?"

"Certainly, Commander," Delan says and places the items somewhere from out of view. "That will be 6000 credits."

Shepard handed over the credit chit and Delan carefully took it from him and swiped it across the desk in a way like credit cards were swiped. The desk beeps to signify the transfer and the hanar returns the chit back to Shepard before he turns to me. Gosh, this is going to be awkward with talking to a floating blob that has no face.

"And what can this one do for you, Miss?" Delan asks in its monotone voice.

"Um, I'd like to buy a suit of armour, please," I shyly tell him. "And a new set of weapons."

"Of course you may," Delan says and he brings out what looked like a weird tape measure. Using it, he measures my height, waist and head until he waves his tentacles in a strange fashion and he floats over behind the counter. The tentacles pick up eight sets of boxes and lay them on the table for me to look at. They look like they were in the light and medium range for just two of each.

I peer at them and could easily read: Ursa, Predator, Scorpion, and Mantis.

It was a tough decision but I knew exactly what I wanted. I pointed to the medium Ursa armour and Delan picks up the box and hands it over to me. I even pick out a brand new Mantis sniper rifle, a new pair of Predator pistols (dude, I love dual wielding!), an M-7 Lancer assault rifle, and even a cool looking combat knife. The last one may come in handy when I might mix up with close range combat like with the geth that ended up breaking my nose for. I even buy a new set of clothes that would last me a while on the _Normandy_. Delan even gives me a free omni-tool on top of that with a new password and address details.

"That will be 25600 credits," Delan says.

Christ, I hope there's enough on this little chit. I hand it over to the hanar and he peers at it, humming. "It would seem that there are 60000 credits on this," he muses. "That shall be enough."

What?! 60000 credits?! Either I was really lucky or that dead guy I got the chit from was filthy rich! I don't say anything since it would no doubt cause suspicion amongst the crew.

Delan swipes the chit across the table and hands it back to me. I then pick up the armour and weapons and head into the change room on the side of the shop, leaving my clothes with Ash who stuffs them into a bag she had brought along with her after I discussed with her about needing new items. It took me a while, but I manage to change into the armour and clasping the weapons onto my back and strapping the pistols on my hips in two holsters that came with them.

I pick up my clothes and step out of the change room, all neatly changed into my armour. I know that the armour came with a new helmet as well, but I have a huge dislike for it. Even the armour was dull to my taste with those dark grey army patches coating the white. I'd have to remind myself to get it customised the next time we visit the Citadel.

"This one wishes to thank you and to come again," Delan says in an enthusiastic manner, much to my amusement.

I stuff the clothes into the bag and flex my arms a bit to get a good feel of the armour. It fit me just perfectly and Delan got the measurements just right! I really couldn't wait to get this customised and even better looking than before.

"That armour really suits you," Kaidan grins as Shepard leads the way to the Citadel Tower. "Makes you look fit for battle."

I look away, blushing. "Thanks," I say awkwardly.

We finally reach the Tower and step into the elevator. Shepard presses the up button and it slowly rises. Oh god, I forgot how slowly these damn things move, even if it was to pass the loading time. But that wasn't really what was bothering me. We were getting ever closer to meeting my all time favourite turian and I was nervous as fuck!

"Hey, you alright?" Ash asks as she peers over at me. "You're playing with your hands again."

"I-I'm fine," I answer, not even realising that I was doing it again. This was getting to be a really bad habit. "It's just... I've never been so further into the Citadel before. I mean, it's so much more lifelike than I could've imagined. All these aliens, all these new sights, sounds and smells... it's... overwhelming!"

"I know how you feel," Shepard agrees, nodding. "It's so strange and exciting at the same time. It gets you psyched."

"Hmm, why don't we past the time by teaching you how to use your omni-tool?" Kaidan suggests.

Wait, what? I glance down at the omni-tool on my left arm and shift about again in discomfort. "Are you sure we have time for it?" I ask. "I mean, we could be almost at the top."

"There's plenty of time before we arrive," Ash smiles, her tone friendly. "Open up your omni-tool."

I sigh and do as she orders. Learning the basics of using an omni-tool seemed pretty difficult at first, but with Ash's guidance and Kaidan's patience, I managed to learn a few tricks like hacking, decryption, and even the ever awesome Overload (oh boy that technique could come in handy against geth in the future). Kaidan even gives me a little program that would help me improve my hacking skills, providing me a fun challenge. I even manage to learn how to download some music from the extranet to settle with the good old fashion twenty-first century music much to everyone's displeasure. Wow, what a tough crowd.

I thank them both just as we reach the top floor.

We make our way up the stairs, my eyes wide with excitement and awe. It's so overwhelming to be in the most beautiful part of the Citadel, here where the Council make decisions and everything in between. It's beyond amazing and strange.

My eyes return to the land of the living and I feel myself begin to shake. There, talking with Executor Pallin was none other than Garrus Vakarian, and my heart skips a beat.


End file.
